A Woke D-Day

NORMANDY, France, June 6, 1944

In a surprise aggressive move, American and British troops are landing on the beaches in Normandy today.

Germany’s Transocean News Service reports that Germans vacationing in the sleepy hamlets of this coastal region were awakened by the ships, planes, guns, and bombs of this sneak attack. A few brave German tourists quickly ran to bunkers and began returning fire to protect their French brothers and sisters.

Germany has already been subject to a horrifying 363 air raids by the Allied air forces in an attempt to terrorize its citizens. British bombers have already dropped over 45,000 tons of bombs while American aircraft dropped 23,000 tons. Nearly 1.7 million people have been forced from their homes, creating what the United Nations has called the greatest refugee problem in history. Many fleeing Germans only stopped briefly to say their goodbyes to the friends they made at the various camps throughout Germany and Poland.

The attack on the Normandy coast was an oppressive show of military might, the Allied forces having amassed the largest armada in human history, building a harbor where none previously existed, and sneaking into it unnoticed. On college campuses, various socialist student organizations have held vigils, protests, and riots to condemn this “illegal occupation.” They noted that the deaths in Germany have numbered in the millions while Americans have had relatively few casualties, perhaps only 100,000 to 200,000. If the number of vacationers in the German camps are included, that German death count increases by another 6 million. It is obvious from the numbers that this militant operation is an attempt to murder innocent Germans and wipe out their culture. The League of Nations has labeled this action illegal under international law.

Protests are occurring in all major American cities, with demonstrators shouting that they will support the indigenous people of Germany against the occupying Allied forces, and they will not stop until this “disproportionate” action is halted, and the “imperialist” invading military is defunded.

American heroes including Charles Lindbergh and Henry Ford have come out strongly against this illegal and heartbreaking invasion that has resulted in the deaths of innocent Germans.

Of course, some known deplorables like communist Charlie Chaplin and B-movie actor Ronald Reagan have stood by America and foolishly proclaimed that this invasion is needed for self-defense and to “save Western civilization,” as if Western civilization were somehow superior to others, such as Aryan civilization.

American Corporations including Coca-Cola, MGM, Ford Motor Co., General Motors and IBM all declared that in they are operating in solidarity with their oppressed German brethren. They will be donating money to the German Lives Matter group and step up their hiring of Germanic-Americans.

The “Squad,” consisting of Mildred “Axis Sally” Gillars, William “Lord Haw-Haw” Joyce, and Iva “Tokyo Rose” Toguri have been sitting for interviews with the press and doing radio and television shows to get out the word about their cause and make Americans aware that their politicians are being dishonest and immoral and also advising the Allied soldiers that their wives are cheating on them back home.

From the comfort of his simple bunker amid the constant bombing, German leader Adolf Hitler stated that Germany simply wants to reclaim land that was forcefully and illegally taken from it in 1918: Austria, Hungary, Czechoslovakia, Yugoslavia, Romania, and Poland. If only these stolen lands were returned, there would be peace, he said.

The League of Nations condemned the Allies for their unequal response and called for an end to the cycle of violence. League officials hope that a cease-fire can be obtained before Germany has been overrun and the Allies institute their own government, as these officials have discovered a secret “Marshall Plan” that surely will impose martial law on Germany and result in the end of the German Reich, which is intended to last 1,000 years.