The day was really quite beautiful, so I sat down and had a cold beer.
The drink facilitated some deep thinking.

My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing,
and I said, “Nothing.”
The reason I said “Nothing” instead of saying “Just thinking” is because she then would have asked, “About what?”
At that point I would have had to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics, which would lead to other questions.

Finally I pondered an age old question:
Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?

Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts, but how could they know?
Well, after another beer, and some more heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with an answer to that question.

Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby, and even though I obviously couldn’t really know, here is the reason for my conclusion:
A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say,
“It might be nice to have another child.”
But you never hear a guy say,
“You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts.”

I rest my case.

Time for another beer. Then, maybe a nap.

-Unknown Author