Ukraine Reclassifies U.S. Tanks as “Recreational Vehicles” to Skirt Restrictions.

As the war in Ukraine rages on, the country has reached out to western governments—including the United States—for support. If you have been following news on the conflict, you know that those requests for materiél and money has led to intense debate. Many U.S. politicians want to help Ukraine, but are feeling iffy about sending them tanks and other stronger weapons systems out of fear of escalating what has become, essentially, a proxy war with Russia, a geopolitical foe.

Though American trucks seem to make it over to Ukraine with little issue, and America has been sending HIMARs missile systems to the Ukrainian army and is even helping train those troops, there remains plenty of military hardware that has yet to clear the comfort bar among U.S. policymakers. Tanks, for example, have remained off the table—for now—but are high on the Ukrainian Defense Ministry’s wish list. So, naturally, that Ministry took to Twitter to pose the question, what if a tank was no longer a “tank?” To illustrate the point the ministry produced a commercial that you’re going to want to watch—several times.

If you recall Chevrolet’s early ’90s “Heartbeat of America” ad campaign, which included several spots featuring trucks such as the Silverado being unnecessarily abused all to the tune of Like a Rock by Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band, what Ukraine is doing here might seem familiar. The Heartbeat of America slow motion shots of heavy payloads being needlessly dropped into truck beds as a voiceover stating that “when you’re the best you can take a few knocks.” It really is one of the best examples of a corporation trying its best to appeal to masculinity and patriotism in the cheesiest way possible.

Apparently the Ukraine Defense Ministry remembers those commercials, too, because it produced a parody of sorts that reimagines the M1A2 Abrams Tank as a “recreational utility vehicle.” The commercial touts the 1,500-hp tank as being “rugged,” “dependable,” and “powerful,” all adjectives we’re pretty sure Chevrolet used in at least a few of its own commercials.

What really gets us is how footage of the tank is cut together with all the best truck commercial tropes like horses running in slow motion, a boy scout running with an American flag flowing behind him, and then more horses. The spot ends stating “Because the best things made in America shouldn’t stay in America.”

No matter what your politics are, you’ve gotta admit this is pretty damn funny, though we should point out that, no, our Ultimate Car Rankings won’t be reclassifying M1 Abrams tanks as “full-size pickup trucks” anytime soon…