Category: You Can’t Make This Up

Biden Administration Declares Trump Cabinet Picks ‘Unqualified’

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U.S. — The party responsible for appointing a Transportation Secretary whose only relevant experience was an apparent love of for toy trains has declared Trump’s cabinet picks “unqualified.”

The Democratic Party, fresh off appointing a dude who wears dresses as a health minister, a guy who steals women’s luggage as nuclear weapons officer, and a Joker-costume-wearing lesbian who can’t answer questions as Press Secretary, felt that Trump’s choices did not have the proper credentials for their jobs.

“President-Elect Trump has beclowned himself with these appointments,” said Senator Elizabeth Warren, handing her makeup bag to Admiral Levine. “These are serious roles with real responsibilities. We need the absolute best, and — hey, has anyone seen my luggage?”

Fox News correspondent Peter Doocy asked if the White House had any official statement about Trump’s selections, to which Karine-Jean Pierre screamed, “I’m gay” and ran out of the room sobbing.

At publishing time, the people responsible for Afghani civilians hanging on to a cargo plane’s wheel well stated that Trump’s choice for Secretary of Defense was incompetent.

Never forget what they did to us.
Never forget what they meant to do to us.
Never.
Don’t give them the benefit of the doubt next time.
And did they forget we have guns?

CDC Planned Quarantine Camps, Nationwide

No matter how bad you think Covid policies were, they were intended to be worse.

Consider the vaccine passports alone. Six cities were locked down to include only the vaccinated in public indoor places. They were New York City, Boston, Chicago, New Orleans, Washington, D.C., and Seattle. The plan was to enforce this with a vaccine passport. It broke. Once the news leaked that the shot didn’t stop infection or transmission, the planners lost public support and the scheme collapsed.

It was undoubtedly planned to be permanent and nationwide if not worldwide. Instead, the scheme had to be dialed back.

Features of the CDC’s edicts did incredible damage. It imposed the rent moratorium. It decreed the ridiculous “six feet of distance” and mask mandates. It forced Plexiglas as the interface for commercial transactions. It implied that mail-in balloting must be the norm, which probably flipped the election. It delayed the reopening as long as possible. It was sadistic.

Even with all that, worse was planned. On July 26, 2020, with the George Floyd riots having finally settled down, the CDC issued a plan for establishing nationwide quarantine camps. People were to be isolated, given only food and some cleaning supplies. They would be banned from participating in any religious services. The plan included contingencies for preventing suicide. There were no provisions made for any legal appeals or even the right to legal counsel.

The plan’s authors were unnamed but included 26 footnotes. It was completely official. The document was only removed on about March 26, 2023. During the entire intervening time, the plan survived on the CDC’s public site with little to no public notice or controversy.

It was called “Interim Operational Considerations for Implementing the Shielding Approach to Prevent COVID-19 Infections in Humanitarian Settings.”

“This document presents considerations from the perspective of the U.S. Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) for implementing the shielding approach in humanitarian settings as outlined in guidance documents focused on camps, displaced populations and low-resource settings.

This approach has never been documented and has raised questions and concerns among humanitarian partners who support response activities in these settings. The purpose of this document is to highlight potential implementation challenges of the shielding approach from CDC’s perspective and guide thinking around implementation in the absence of empirical data.

Considerations are based on current evidence known about the transmission and severity of coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) and may need to be revised as more information becomes available.”

By absence of empirical data, the meaning is: nothing like this has ever been tried. The point of the document was to map out how it could be possible and alert authorities to possible pitfalls to be avoided.

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After Nasrallah, Another Hezbollah Leader Killed In Israeli Strike

The Israel Defense Forces (IDF) conducted a precision strike in the Dahieh district of Beirut on Saturday, eliminating senior Hezbollah intelligence operative Hassan Khalil Yassin. This operation took place not long after Hezbollah declared Hassan Nasrallah, their erstwhile leader, dead.

Yassin oversaw a division that was in charge of locating military and civilian targets both inside Israeli territory and near the country’s northern border. Yassin had a key role in communicating with Hezbollah’s attack divisions, according to the IDF. Throughout the conflict, he was instrumental in organizing assaults on troops and civilians in Israel.

The IDF said that the attack on Yassin was led by the Military Intelligence Directorate. The military made a point of highlighting Yassin’s role in organizing more terror strikes that are expected to take place in the next few days. His removal is a component of a larger plan to undermine Hezbollah’s capacity for operations.

Prior attacks focused on a number of Hezbollah locations in Lebanon, including factories that produce rocket and missile launchers. The IDF targeted smuggling routes near the Syrian border on Friday night. These routes were essential for bringing parts and weaponry into Lebanon from the east. According to the IDF, these materials were sent to factories that make a range of weaponry, including missiles with precise guidance.

Jill Biden’s Cosplaying As President Just Got Much Weirder

The saga of Jill Biden cosplaying as president of the United States just got a lot weirder, and this time the press is involved.

On Friday, questions arose after she was spotted sitting at the head of the table and leading a cabinet meeting at the White House. That it was the first in over a year only made the situation more perplexing. Joe Biden doesn’t meet with his cabinet for that long and when he finally does, his unelected wife takes the lead? Then, later on the same day, it was revealed that her name was being embossed on honorary legislation folders as if she were equal to the president.

She wasn’t done, though. In what appears to be a very coordinated campaign at this point, MSNBC put out a slobbering segment in which Jill Biden gives “journalist” Peter Alexander an Oval Office tour. The two are also seen discussing the “transfer of power” as if her opinion on such matters is relevant.

To call all of this odd is an understatement. Jill Biden taking a leading role in multiple aspects of the administration all on the same day is too obvious to count as a coincidence. There’s a message being sent here. What exactly that is is up for consideration, but I suspect Joe Biden’s relinquishing of the presidential nomination to Kamala Harris has something to do with it.

The ride is almost over for his wife. Those Air Force One rides and taxpayer-funded vacations end in January. Perhaps she just wants to make a few memories, inappropriate and head-scratching as they may be. Of course, the other possibility is far worse. Namely, that Joe Biden is so completely unable to fulfill the duties of his office that Jill Biden is having to step in “unofficially” in a much more public fashion.

I’m not sure what’s worse, that Americans are having to deal with all this amid an array of serious issues facing the country or that members of the press are absolutely giddy about it. Check out this picture of Alexander in the Oval Office.

Joe Biden dropped out of the presidential race while insisting he’s completely mentally fit to serve and that he’s the most “consequential” president in modern history, and hacks like Alexander are taking pictures at the Resolute Desk smiling like a five-year-old. Interviewing Jill Biden would have been a great opportunity to drill down on her husband’s escalating senility and how he can remain in office despite being unable to run for reelection. Instead, like a good little lackey, Alexander tossed some softballs and got his novelty photograph as if he went to an amusement park.

It’s pathetic. This is not what journalism is supposed to be. This is also not what a First Lady is supposed to be doing. Are there no serious reporters left in the mainstream press who will bother to ask what in the heck is going on?

You don’t say…..

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FBI received tip about Ryan Routh in 2019 but probe was closed, authorities say

The FBI received a tip about the suspect behind the apparent assassination attempt of former US president Donald Trump five years ago but the investigation was later closed, authorities have revealed.

Ryan Routh, 58, was arrested on Sunday after authorities said he stalked Trump as he golfed in West Palm Beach, Florida, with an AK-47-style rifle.

Prosecutors said that Routh would be charged with possession of a firearm by a convicted felon and possession of a firearm with an obliterated serial number.
In a press conference on Monday, the FBI said it received a tip in 2019 about Routh being in possession of a firearm despite a prior felony conviction.

FBI Special Agent in Charge in Miami Jeff Veltri said the probe was closed after the tipster would not confirm making the report.

“In following up on the tip, the alleged complainant was interviewed and did not verify providing the initial information,” he said.

The FBI said it notified local police in Honolulu about the tip, but the investigation was closed.

Routh could face up to 15 years in prison if convicted on one of the charges.

A bond hearing has been scheduled for next week.

Authorities said Secret Service agents fired at Routh who then dropped the rifle and fled in a car, leaving the firearm behind along with two backpacks, a scope used for aiming and a camera.

He was taken into custody on Sunday after being stopped on a Florida highway.

The incident came two months after another attempt on Trump’s life at a rally in Pennsylvania.

During the press conference on Monday, the Secret Service said that Routh “did not have a line of sight” on Trump and never fired his weapon.

The FBI’s analysis of cell phone data showed Routh was around the golf course for about 12 hours before the Secret Service encountered him.

Routh, who owns a small Hawaii construction company, had previously criticized Trump on social media.

He also regularly posted about the war in Ukraine and had a website where he raised money and recruited volunteers to go to Kyiv.

Campaign finance records also revealed that Routh made 19 small political donations since 2019 to ActBlue, a political action committee that supports Democratic candidates.